Sunset
by maddy.amy
Summary: Bella has always wanted to be a vampire. But Edward wants to be human, to be able to live a normal life with Bella. What will Edward do to be able to become a human? What risks will he take to be with the love of his life?
1. Beginnings

I was willing to make the sacrifice that would change me into a vampire. I knew the consequences, and accepted them greatly, as the very thought of being with Edward made me realise that I would do anything at all just to have him in my life forever.

And as we both lay on my bed, with Edward's cold arms around me I couldn't help but think that this sacrifice would be completely worth it. I was so deeply in love with Edward, that it seemed like a very small thing to do, which is to trade my soul, in return for a life with Edward, in which every day would of my existence be spent with him.

Tonight however, it seemed as if something was on his mind. I turned my head around and stroked his cheek. 'Please Edward; tell me what you're thinking. Why are you so consumed in your thoughts tonight?' I asked. Just as I said this, Edward turned onto his side, so his face was only inches away from mine. I could smell his sweet scent which although I had smelt so many times before, always blew me away every time I smelt it.

'Bella,' he paused, his smooth voice still lingering in my head. 'I know you well. Even better then myself sometimes. I know what you have been thinking lately, and I know how much you want to be a vampire. But I don't believe you realise the true impact this will have on you. I know I have said this so many times before, but please, just stay human. I love you too much to let you die.' He said this so quickly that I had to think back on the words in my head, and let them truly sink in.

I pulled his face closer to mine, 'Edward, I want to be with you forever. Do you really think you will like me when I am ninety?' He went to interrupt, but I cut over him. 'I know what you are going to say, but just think about it. How will I look going out with you when I am ninety?' I pulled a face as I saw the image in my head. 'Please, just let me be like you.' I said quietly, and he was silent for a few minutes, before kissing me softly. 'Bella, I will love you too much to care about what other people think. But this reason does not justify why you should become a soulless monster like me. But I know your position; please believe me when I say that I would do anything to be turned back into a human, just to be with you until death- to have children and grandchildren. To live a normal life in which anything is possible.'

I thought about this. I imagined what it would be like to be living in a lovely house with children and with a husband that will age with me. But I did not let thought this win the argument, and continued with my side 'Edward, if you know my position, then why not change me if you know what it feels like?'

'Because, I refuse to make you a monster.' With that, he kissed me, his lips filled with passion, and pulled me closer to him, successfully distracting me. 'I love you so much Bella' he said, and began to sing my lullaby.

'Love you too Edward.' I said, and fell asleep quickly, while thinking about me and Edward both being human.


	2. Dreams

**My first fanfiction-hope you all enjoy. Please review :) **

**Disclaimer- I don't own Twilight.**

As soon as I fell asleep, I dreamt. It was like no dream I had ever had before. Edward was there, naturally, he always was in my dreams. But I was not used to having dreams which made me happy. Most dreams I have result in me waking up panting and sweating, and with Edward frantically trying to calm me down.

However, this dream made me exuberant that I woke up with a smile on my face. Edward was sitting in the corner of my room on my rocking chair looking at me strangely. "Morning" I said blissfully. "Why are you looking at me like that? What's wrong?"

Edward leaned forward and smiled. My favourite smile which knocked the wind out of me every time I saw it. "Nothing at all is the matter, love." He said. "You just haven't woken up without having nightmare for months, let alone smiling. It makes me happy to see you happy."

I laughed. "Yes I know, I had an amazing dream." I said lazily, stretching and getting out of my bed. "It feels good to be able to wake up happy." I got up and sat on Edwards lap, and rested my head on his chest. "What was this dream about then?" he asked. As soon as he said that I realised I couldn't tell him about my dream. It couldn't let Edward know what I was really thinking, and I did not want to let him on this. "Oh, um, I can't really remember. I know it was you and me, and that always makes me happy." I lied, hoping that it would be convincing enough, and hoping my blushing wouldn't let me down. "Alright then" Edward said, and I knew he didn't believe me, but thankfully he let it go.

He really couldn't know about this dream, as much as I longed to tell him. In this dream Edward was a human. We were both equal. Of course he was still breathtakingly beautiful, but less so. He looked fairly similar, however he had deep green eyes, and his features were not so angular. I was running through the forest with him, and we were both going at the same speed. We then suddenly stopped running and turned around. Behind us were two gorgeous children, one girl with dark green eyes, and a boy with my chocolate brown eyes. I realised that these children were ours. There were yelling at us to stop and let them catch up with Edward and me. They were both around eight years old, and both stunning. The girl came up to Edward and hugged him, while the boy came up to me and hugged me. A surge of adoration ran through me, and the love I felt was amazing for both of the children. I held Edwards hand, and he had the same look plastered on his face that I feel I had on mine. Our little family then all grabbed hands and walked into the distance, with the sun setting on the horizon.

If I told Edward about this dream, I have no idea what he would do. Probably apologize profusely for what he was doing to me by falling in love with a vampire, and make me realise how lucky I was to have him. But the idea of us both being equal intrigued me greatly, but I knew it was impossible, and how selfish I was acting by trying to make Edward to same as me, when it was possible for me to become a vampire.

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward asked. I must have zoned out in my thoughts. "Yeah, sorry I was just... thinking. Sorry." I explained. "That's fine love, but what were you thinking?" he asked, with curiosity lingering on his voice. "Just about us. Nothing new really." My stomach grumbling interrupted me. "Human minute?" I asked. "Sure love, I will meet you in the kitchen." I got off Edwards lap and kissed him gently. "See you soon"

I walked into the bathroom and looked at my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks were flushed, and me eyes had no dark circles beneath them. I looked very healthy and refreshed, and this was not a normal look for me. I stepped out of my pyjamas and into the shower. The hot water was relaxing, and helped to clear my head of all the selfish thoughts I had had in my head. After the shower I got dressed and brushed my teeth, and then dried my hair.

I walked downstairs with the smell of bacon in the house, and made me realise how hungry I was. I started walking down the stairs even faster, and almost fell but made it down the stairs somehow.

"Hello." Edward turned around as I spoke and smiled at me. "Edward, you didn't have to make me breakfast! I was fine with some cereal." I gushed, and thought once again how lucky I was to have Edward in my life. "No problem, Bella." He said, and set some bacon and eggs down onto the table. I ate it greedily, and it was gone quickly.

"Hungry?" Edward asked. I laughed, "Yeah, kind of." I got up and went to rinse my bowl. "What should we do today then?" I asked. "Maybe we could go to your house- I haven't seen Emmett and Rose in ages, or Esme." "Sure" Edward said. "Oh, and by the way, you look absolutely beautiful today." I smiled, and kissed Edward on the cheek.

* * *

Emmett greeted me with a huge bear hug, which Rosalie gave me a quick smile. At least our relationship is better than it was. Esme came hugged me daintily, and pecked me on the cheek. I can't help but think of her as my own mother sometimes, she is just so loving.

After talking to my second family for a while, Edward dragged me to his room. He put on some music from his vast music collection, and came and sat on his couch with me. He put his arm around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. While looking out his huge windows and the pine trees surrounding their huge white mansion, I couldn't help but think of the dream I had that night, and how much I would like that to become a reality. Even though I acted like I wasn't scared of becoming a vampire, deep down I was petrified. The thought of the pain I will have to go through, and that I won't even know myself for over a year after my change frightened me so much. But these thoughts left my head as soon as I thought of them, as these selfish thoughts were made for my benefit, no one else's. It would be so much easier for me to just become a vampire.

"Bella?" Edward whispered. "Mmm?" I replied. "When are you going to tell me what you are thinking? Please tell me soon otherwise I am going to go mad!" he said, sounding exasperated. I knew that I couldn't completely lie to him any longer, so I decided to tell him a softened version of what I was thinking.

"Well, I am just very nervous of actually becoming a vampire." I said. "I know you pretend it won't happen, but we both know it will." Edward grimaced, but didn't deny it. "I'm scared of the pain and that I will not be the same person" I admitted, and hoped Edward didn't notice that I was softening my thoughts down. "Bella, I know what mean. And trust me; you will never be pressured into doing anything you want to do." He said, with no trace of doubt about what I said being a lie. "I will always love you, no matter what. Human or vampire." With that he kissed me, and it grew with passion. He pulled me closer to him, his hands caressing my face. As usual, he stopped before I wanted him to. "I love you Edward." I murmured. "My heart will forever be yours" He simply replied.

I looked out the window and realised it had grown dark, and as if Edward could read my mind, he said "I think it's time to get you home" I agreed, and after saying goodbye to the Cullen's, we arrived back at my house quickly.

I was already very late, so I said goodnight to Charlie and ran to bed. Edward was already there, and I crawled into his arms and hoped for another night of happiness.


	3. Scare

**Sorry it took me so long to update, been really busy with school**

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It didn't take me long to fall asleep, as the thought of a happy dream made it very easy to fall asleep. Yet, when I fell asleep I was not by the sort of dream I had so hoped to have.

I was walking into a room, and realised it was Edwards. He was resting on his couch calmly, his eyes closed. I smiled, and went to him and lay next to him. He hugged me closely, and this was where my dream quickly deteriorated. Edward suddenly started viciously shaking, his eyes startlingly open, and it looked like her no control whatsoever on his body. I sat up and cupped his cheeks with my hands and called his name fearfully. His back then lifted in an awkward way, and he started screaming. His screaming was blood curdling, and made me cry and scream his name frantically. His screams continued, and got more and more painful to listen to, and scared me even more. He suddenly stopped, his whole body still shaking, and his eyes closed. His body stopped shaking slowly, and he didn't open his eyes. I screamed his name again, and rocked his body. I started crying, and screamed his name louder.

I shot up quickly in bed, screaming like I was in my dream. Cool hands pulled me down and held me close. I started sobbing into Edwards's chest, while he murmured comforting words and stroked my cheeks. I feel into a dreamless sleep afterwards, still sobbing. Edward shouldn't have been there, he didn't need to see me like this. But I needed him so much; I would have screamed all night if he hadn't been there. It felt like I was getting more selfish by the day.

When daylight shined in through my windows, opening my eyes took all the energy out of me- the heaviness of them was almost unbearable from all the crying I had done. As soon as my eyes were open, Edwards face was in front of me. His face was full of worry, and I can only imagine how bad I looked after the few hours of sleep I had gotten.

"Bella-"he started to say. I cut him off though, I did not need to be reminded of what I had dreamt of, it was so horrible I could only wish to be able to erase it from my mind, but of course I knew that was not going to happen.

"Edward, please, I do not want to talk about it." I said, but it came out sharper then I thought it would. "I don't mean it harshly, I just don't want to have to relive what I dreamt- it was so horrible." I shuddered as I thought about my dream again, and Edward pulled me closer and kissed my hair. "Okay, love. But I wasn't going to ask. I just wanted to see if you were okay. Your screams, well last night they weren't normal. They frightened me almost to death, although I already am, but Bella, are you okay?"

I thought briefly about lying, but I knew he would see through me. It was too hard to lie about this anyway. "I'm fine Edward, it's just my dream last night was so vivid, nothing like my dream two nights ago."

I gasped in horror suddenly. I realised what my dream was about. My dream two nights ago was my being happy, so naturally it would have to be counteracted by something. So, my dream last night was about what would happen when he was turned into a vampire. Excruciating pain for him, and the same for me on the inside. Of course my dream probably isn't accurate to what would really happen, but it was terrifying all the same. I hid my head in Edwards chest so he wouldn't see my eyes watering, and he stroked my hair soothingly.

"Bella, Bella, its fine, you're safe, it's okay." He said softly, with an undertone of panic in his voice. Probably a reaction to my gasp, and the fact that my eyes were watering, which I knew Edward knew about.

I grasped a hold of myself, and sat up off my bed. Edward sat up next to me and wrapped his arms around me. "Bella, are you up to going to school?" he asked nervously. I wiped my eyes before speaking. "Yes, of course. I just need to get ready." I said as I got up, and almost fell over from all the energy that had been drained from me. However, I fell into cold arms which lifted me back up. "Thanks" I murmured, and feeling my cheeks slowly turning red. Edward laughed nervously, the sound was like music, and helped to relax me. "Okay love" he said. "I'll meet you out the front and will drive you to school."

After a shower, I ran downstairs grabbing a granola bar, considering how late I was after overcoming my dream. I scurried out the front door, and saw Edwards Volvo in the driveway. I jumped into the front seat, for once grateful for Edwards manic driving. Thanks to his driving, we arrived at school just on the bell.

School droned on, and lunch was the only highlight. Emmett was telling me embarrassing stories about Edward, which made my mood rise greatly.

After school Edward took me back to my house, and began to help me with my homework; however I didn't have enough patience to complete it so I left if half done. I rested my head back on the couch, and unfortunately thought about the dream. If this was what was going to happen to Edward, then I did not want him to do this for me. But, I could not shake the image out of my head of being able to grow old with Edward. And I didn't know why I was so obsessed with the idea of him being human. I have a great life with him and it will continue on into forever if I just turn into a vampire.

I will never be able to have children though. The idea of children had never appealed to me, but after my dream of pure happiness it pulled me closer to the thought of having children. Not necessarily my children, but Edwards as well. It felt right to have our love create something. But I could not have this happen if Edward was going to be in pain. He was my main priority. As he always will be.

"Bella?" Edward asked. "Sorry to wake you, but Charlie will be here in fifteen minutes, so I have to go." He said, and I could tell he really wanted to ask about what I was thinking. "Oh, I didn't realise I was even asleep." I said, confused. "Will you be here tonight?" I asked hopefully, I did not want to have a nightmare again without him being there.

"Of course" he said, and kissed me. "Bye, love." he said in a low voice. I did not want him to go, but I had to get up and start making dinner.

When Charlie got home, I realised that I was not hungry with all the thoughts that were in my head.

"I'm not eating, Charlie" I said. "Okay Bells, you feeling okay?" he replied. "Yeah, I'm fine, just, um, not feeling well." I lied.

I ran up the stairs to my room, and was met by a face I had not seen before.


	4. Uncertainty

**Please review everyone, I really want to get to at least 10 reviews please!!!**

**Oh, and just so everyone knows, this story is set between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.**

**Thanks for reading everyone. **

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On my bed sat a vampire, with bright red eyes. They were so bright I could not bring myself to look away from the piercing eyes, but when I did I realised the vampire was absolutely stunning, as all vampires are.

The vampire looked at me, and she smiled softly. I began to breathe a lot faster and heavier, and I could feel my heart beating through my chest. I thought about Charlie downstairs, and begged that she would kill me rather than him, or at least not notice Charlie at all. She smiled again, but not in a menacing way. She simply looked curious. My breathing was still fast however, I did not know if this was all an act.

"Bella" she said. It was an insult to call her voice speaking- her voice was so musical and elegant. "You need my help. I know what you want."

What was this vampire talking about? What did I want? I tried to speak back at her, but I could not find my voice. "Just think about it, Bella." she said. With that, she gracefully leaped out my window and I didn't hear a thud as she hit the ground, so I rushed to my window. There was no trace of her anywhere, so I wondered if it was all a dream. Why would a vampire be at my house?

My thoughts overwhelmed me and I needed to sit down. I didn't make it to my bed in time, so I collapsed on the floor. I was still awake, yet it felt as I was asleep and dreaming as my thoughts were so consuming.

The vampire's words were running through my head. "You need my help. I know what you want." What did I need help with? My life was pretty good at the moment; I did not need any help. Victoria was dead; it couldn't be anything about that. Could it? Edward and I were engaged, our relationship was still amazing, and so it definitely couldn't be anything about that.

Why was I not scared of this vampire? I should be terrified, but I felt more intrigued by her then anything. Her arrival left me at a loss for words, I had absolutely no clue what to think of her strange appearance.

I was suddenly brought back to my room, away from my thoughts with a voice. "Bella, Bella! Bella! Bella!" The voice sounded urgent, so I dragged myself away from my head and found topaz eyes staring into mine worryingly.

"Bella! You frightened me, I didn't know what was going on with you!" he said too quickly, but I understood what he meant. He hugged me and kissed me gently. "I was so petrified that you were hurt, your room smells so strongly of a vampire scent I have never smelt. What happened?"

Edward helped me off the floor and pulled me onto my bed. I sat against the headboard and pulled my knees up to my face, trying to grasp onto the words to tell him what happened. He looked at me anxiously, and came and sat onto the wall next to me.

"Bella? You don't have to tell me if you don't feel you want to, I can go and get Alice." He went to get up, but I pulled him back down. "Edward" I whispered. "I do want to tell you, I'm just trying to find the words to do so." He nodded, and I eventually worked out what to say.

"Edward, it was so strange." I said, speaking softly. "I came up to my room and saw this vampire, she was just sitting on my bed." Edwards face froze; I could tell that he was truly angry. I quickly began speaking again, I didn't want Edward to do anything rash. I felt like this vampire could do something, that she and I had this unconnected bond. I was not willing to shake that off before I knew what that bond was, so I did not want Edward to run after her scent and try and destroy her.

"She smiled at me, at first I thought it was going to be a menacing smile, but it was actually quite a soft smile." I thought quickly about telling Edward about what she said, but I decided to tell him. I had been keeping a lot from him, I didn't want him to start to think I was lying about a lot of things.

"She then said 'You need my help. I know what you want'. I have no idea what she meant by that, but as soon as I tried to ask her she leaped out the window. I guess I got so devoted to my thoughts that I had to sit down, and soon after you arrived" I said. Edward no longer looked like he was being controlled by his anger, although he still looked angry. Most of his face was taken over by how puzzled he was.

"Edward, what do you think?" I asked, hoping he would have the correct answer. "Sorry Bella, but I have no idea. Maybe she knew about you trying to become a vampire, and wanted to give you some advice?" I thought about this, and realised quickly it may be correct, but it didn't feel right. I knew it must be something deeper, but it was something I couldn't grasp. I didn't let Edward know about these thought though.

"Maybe you might be right, it was all very interesting though" I said, and Edward looked as if he agreed with me. I yawned at this point, and realised how tired I was. I had forgotten all about my pathetic night sleep the previous night, and recognized that I desperately needed sleep. Edward seemed to agree with me, and pulled my under my blankets. I closed my eyes sluggishly; they were too heavy to close without energy. I briefly felt Edwards's cool hands brush against my face, and I sensed him come and lay next to me. He began to hum my lullaby, and I feel into a deep sleep which gladly I did not dream in.

* * *

School flew by that week. Nothing eventful happened, and before I knew it the weekend had arrived.

The only small thing I noticed was that one lunchtime Alice had a vision. She tried to pass it off as daydreaming- as obviously she couldn't tell everyone what was really happening. When she had the vision, she and Edward had such a quick, worrying glance at each other, it immediately made me think something was very wrong.

When I approached Edward about it, he said it was just Alice worrying as she couldn't see Carlisle's future, and Alice was worried about him.

Although I didn't really believe him, I decided to just to accept it because I had more things to worry about.

"Edward, do you know what that vampire was doing yet?" I asked him that night. "No, I still have no clue. But just out of interest love, what did she look like?" he said, pronouncing every word. It made it seem like he was hiding something, but I didn't want dig into it. "Um, I'm not really sure." I said, trying to rack through my brain to that dreaded day which I had been putting to the back of my mind. "She was gorgeous of course. She had red eyes, but she did not seem as though she wanted to kill me. I'm not sure if she was a newborn or not, I don't believe she was." Edward stiffened, I didn't want to make him uncomfortable, and so I lied and said I wasn't sure if she was a newborn or not. To be honest I didn't have any idea, but I would do anything to make Edwards's life any easier. "She had golden hair that fell in curls down to her mid-back. She had quite a slim face, and an even slimmer body. Her lips were very full, and although she was a vampire she had quite exotic skin."

Edward stiffened even further, and I didn't understand what he was stressed about. I looked at his face and he looked like I had said something that worried him.

"Edward? What did I say?" I asked. He forcefully smiled, and kissed my hair. "Nothing at all. I am just trying to understand why she was here." He said. And once again, I thought he was still hiding something.

I tried to act blasé though, and I seemed to succeed. Although with Edward, I could never tell if he knew I was lying or not.


	5. Silence

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I woke up startled and gasping. Edward wasn't here, where was he? I needed him right now; I had gotten a huge epiphany.

I had realised what the vampire meant. I was so obvious, I had no idea how I had not realised it earlier. I only really wanted one thing. It had been on my mind so often lately, I had not realised what was right in front of me!

The only thing I wanted was Edward to be like me. I can't believe I was being so egocentric, but I couldn't ignore the truth anymore. It really was what I wanted, and what if this vampire could grant me this wish? And what if it may be without pain, unlike in my dream? This vampire could be the answer to my problems.

I needed to see this vampire. I needed to know where she was. But there was no way to contact her, I had no idea how to. I decided I would just have to live in hope that she would pay me another visit, and that I would be able to talk to her.

Rather than getting up, I continued to just lie in bed. I had not just been relaxed for so long, it felt so strange. Yet at the same time it made me feel happy and carefree. That was until I remembered I didn't know where Edward was, and I started to worry intensely about where he could be. It had been a few weeks since I had woken up and he hadn't been here, so maybe it was just me overreacting. But all these other times he had told me he wouldn't be there in the morning. Edward had not mentioned anything about not being here this morning.

To get away from my thoughts, I picked up a book and begun to read. I had always loved reading. It was like a portal to get away from the world, and to be somewhere else. I loved the idea of being someone else, having their emotions and just a different personality to me. Reading was like a realm where you could just be a different character.

I unexpectedly felt hands wrap around my waist. If they weren't so cold I would have been frightened, but considering how cold the hands were I knew I had nothing to worry about. I then felt icy lips press against my shoulder. "Edward" I muttered, laying my book back down. I turned around and was met with the face that was simply the most beautiful I had ever seen. Every time I saw Edward he made himself seem even more unbearably handsome, and it simply took my breath away. Again, I thought about how insanely lucky I was to have him.

"Where did you go?" I asked, trying to keep my voice in monotone so Edward wouldn't suspect I was scared on the inside. He obviously did notice though. "I was organising something. Bella, please do not be alarmed, but we need to go away this weekend." He said gradually. The last time we had gone away was to hide from Victoria. Was she not dead? What if she was still after me? "Victoria" I whispered, and Edward heard me. "Bella, of course it's not Victoria. She is dead." I said, and I felt a low growl erupt from his chest. He was obviously remembering what happened a few weeks ago. It felt like an eternity since that fateful day, and I was so glad it was over. That everyone in my life was safe. Although I was thrilled it wasn't Victoria, I couldn't think about why we would need to go away. "Well then, why do we need to go?" I asked, with a confused tone. "Bella, remember in the cafeteria a couple of days ago, how Alice had that vision about Carlisle?" He asked, and I nodded, remembering my doubt about that statement. "Well, we had to lie. I'm very sorry but it was for your protection. Alice had a vision that a vampire was coming, and she was intent of talking to you. When you gave me the description of the vampire, it fit the vampire that Alice saw in her vision. I don't know what she wants from you, but I'm not going to let her get it. I want to get away from her, and not let her near you. So, I want to go away this weekend. I don't care whereabouts we go, as long as we go somewhere." As soon as Edward said these few words, I realised that I could not go away. I needed to see what this vampire wanted. If she could possibly help me - help Edward and I - then it would be worth risking my safety just to help us. By the looks of things she was not going to hurt me at all.

"Edward, please can we stay at home. Charlie will not be happy with me going away. We only went and saw Renée a few months ago; I don't think he will let me go away again." I lied through my teeth, hoping he wouldn't realise. It seemed like a valid excuse. "Bella, please. We need to go. I am not putting you in jeopardy. I am not going to risk anything with you. Maybe we could just say you are going away with Alice? Surely Charlie will agree to that."

Although Charlie would agree, I needed to meet with this vampire. "Edward, maybe we could just meet with her. Maybe she is harmless; it would help find out what she wants rather than running away every time she wants to come and visit- or whatever she wants to do. You can come too if you want, maybe you could watch from the side to make sure she isn't dangerous. Edward I really want to meet her. I don't want another repeat of Victoria." I exclaimed all in one breath. It made sense to meet with her. I was sick of running away, I just wanted to face my fears rather than letting them devour my life. And I needed Edward to let me do this.

I saw Edward sit as he let my idea soak in. It was a few moments until he responded- moments that felt like hours to me. "Bella, I cannot let anything happen to you. I can't just 'sit by the sidelines' while you are dealing with the vampire by yourself. No. We need to go away." His words were said so caringly it made me consider for a few moments maybe not meeting with this vampire. My rational side was saying to listen to Edward. But a small voice at the back of mind was speaking so clearly to me. I knew I had to see this vampire. "Edward." I began slowly. "You have no idea how much I appreciate that you care. But I need to do this. What if this vampire can help me become a vampire?" I asked, knowing in my heart that this wasn't why she was coming. "What if she can help us? I believe it's logical to go and meet with her. Please Edward. You can stay with me if you wish. But I need to meet with her." At the end of my rant I fought the courage to look at Edward. He was just staring into my eyes. "Edward, please" I whispered. I wanted to meet with this vampire so much. If he would not grant my simple desire, then I would just go and ask Alice or Emmett. They would take me.

I felt Edwards cool hands pull me even closer, and his hands pulled through my hair. "Bella, you're not going to listen to me, are you?" I shook my head. "Fine" he sighed. I felt a surge of relief fly through me "We can go meet with this vampire. I'll go talk to Alice. And probably the wolves as well, they will smell this vampire and may attack her." The wolves. Jake. No one had seen Jake for months. He had run away in wolf form. I called Seth on a regular basis to see were Jacob was. He never knew, Jacob was keeping his thoughts to himself, and very simple if Seth caught any of his thoughts. I missed him so much. He was my sun, and although I had Edward he was always there for me, he was my best friend.

I felt my eyes begin to water, so I closed them quickly so Edward wouldn't see my tears. He did see them however, and cupped my face. "Bella, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have bought that up." He said wiping away my tears with his thumbs. "Edward, its fine. Sorry about that. Thank you for letting me meet with this vampire" I said, and kissed him with passion. I could feel Edwards shocked lips on mine, before he relaxed. I then heard my stomach growl, and Edward pulled away laughing. "Breakfast?" he asked. "Breakfast." I agreed, and got up thinking about the vampire I was meeting. "Edward, just out of interest, when are we meeting this vampire?" I asked, getting head rush from standing up too fast. While grabbing me before a fell over Edward told me we were meeting the vampire the next day. "Tomorrow?" I almost shouted. "That's so close! What should we do?" I asked. "Nothing, love, we just have to go out to the woods and meet her tomorrow morning." He said. I felt a surge of adrenaline rush through my veins as I thought about how I could be meeting the person who could change my life.

I suddenly got a shock when I realised I would have to tell Edward what I was thinking about. The real reason this vampire may be coming. I had to tell him. Although there was still a figure of doubt in my head about the vampire coming to help Edward become a human, in my heart and the majority of my head I knew that she was coming to help with this. What if the vampire came tomorrow and had was thinking about what I wanted? Edward would hear her naturally, and I wanted him to hear it from me rather than a stray vampire.

"Um, Edward?" I asked. "Yes, love?" he replied. I saw in his eyes the utter love in them. I felt I could see into his soul. I realised that I was far too scared to ever try and tell him this. I know he would definitely want me to tell him, Edward hated it whenever I kept things from him. But I was nervous for his response. I decided I needed more time to think about what I was going to say. "Um, why don't we go downstairs and have breakfast?" I asked. Edward nodded and he knew I was hiding something, but he didn't act on it.

Edward went downstairs, while I went into the bathroom and got ready. I thought about the words on how to explain to Edward what I wanted. I somehow gathered up the confidence to talk to Edward about what I wanted, and decided to go downstairs and talk to him about it as soon as possible.

I smiled and thought about Edward being human, and started going down the stairs on a high. But I then remembered that I was truly nervous about talking to Edward about this. I missed a step while being consumed in my thoughts about nerves, and fell backwards and hit my head on a stair, and fell down quickly. I heard Edward call my name while I hit my head on every stair as I fell, and I felt my body become numb, and the outsides of my eyes turn white. When I felt my body stop being abused by stairs, and felt icy hands cup my face. My eyes got more and more unfocused, and I felt my eyelids close and my mind come to a halt.


	6. Advice

**I'm so sorry for not updating, but summer holidays have just begun so I should be able to update more frequently!  
Thanks for reading :) **

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I ran through a forest, carefully dodging the trees. I was met with a glowing figure, and I walked towards it. "Don't worry, Bella" said the figure. "Soon everything will be in place. Edward will be a human like you. You will be two equals. Edward may not be harmed in any way whatsoever; you have nothing to worry about." This figure was speaking leisurely, and it sounded strange. But the figure herself was very unfocused and blurry; I couldn't see any details – just the outline of her more prominent features. It was very strange, but I continued to listen to what the figure was saying. "You will be able to have gorgeous children who will love you effortlessly; their love will be as natural as the wind. You and Edward will die together, knowing that you lived your lives to the fullest and have no chance of going to hell." Although there was no doubt in my mind that the Cullen family would all be going to heaven, it felt nice to hear these words spoken.

This eccentric meeting with this figure did not continue, we simply sat in a comfortable silence that was filled with my thoughts on Edward.

"But Bella, there is no going back on this decision. Won't you feel horrible afterwards? Edward has killed people, not to mention all the animals he has killed just to satisfy his hunger. If you change him, it will all be worth nothing. Sure, it would have kept him alive as a vampire but as a human it will only be worth haunting memories. Also his family – he will have to leave them. They will continue to live as vampires, while you selfishly take away the family he has built. You will be taking away a son from Esme and Carlisle. And you haven't even asked him if he wants to be changed! What if he doesn't? You'll never look at him the same way again! What if he regrets it if he gets changed into a human? What if he doesn't love you, Bella? You have not thought this through! You don't even know if the vampire you are meeting can do this! You have no idea what the change entails! What if it does cause absolute agony to him? What if he wakes up and doesn't remember anything about his vampire life, like the opposite of Alice? What will you do then?" the figure said firmly.

At the end of the figures moving speech, I realised how petty I had been to not even consider certain details about this change. I also saw how selfish I had been.

"Bella, you're being so selfish. You're being very self-centred. You haven't been thinking things through." The figure almost chanted, and continued to ridicule me constantly, and I had to seek any way to get away from her chastising. I ran through the forest but I could still hear the figures voice and her insults were eating away at me. I could feel myself breaking down as I came to a realization; I had been avoiding the possible negative things that could happen because I had been so focused on the positive. The figures words continued to eat away at me, and I curled into a ball on the forest floor and let her words sink into me, and I started sobbing as I saw the truth in her words. The forest seemed to close in on me and her words gained volume and clarity, and it felt as it I was going insane.

The forest continued to close in on me, and her words got louder and louder before I closed my eyes tightly in the hopes that the voices would disappear, and slowly they did. Soon I could hear nothing other than an occasional murmur which was too quiet for me to hear clearly, as well as cool hands touching my wrist and face.

Over time I was able to hear the voice more obviously, and I could centre on what they were saying. "Carlisle, it been an hour and a half! That's too long! For most people it's a number of minutes – not this long! What if something is actually wrong with Bella?" a voice said very panicked.

"Edward, she hit her head multiple times, she is expected to be unconscious for longer. You've seen the state of her head. She may have a small concussion when she wakes up as well as a very sore head. She is probably keeping her mind to herself – you know how Bella is. She was talking so clearly earlier, so she is probably having a vivid dream. Just let her rest. Stop worrying." Another voice said. "Edward! You have exactly 2 minutes and 7 seconds until Bella wakes up! Make sure you are ready!" a higher voice said, and I felt something cold grasp my hand tenderly.

I realised who those voices belonged to, and felt comforted that they were taking care of me. My head hurt so much, and I was reminded by the pain what had happened. I reminisced that I had fallen down the stairs, and my head was hit several times. My body still felt numb, but I began to feel a soreness overtaking it. I sighed internally as I thought about the damage I had done to myself.

My eyes lifted slowly and I was dazed by the brightness that suddenly shocked me. I had to blink a few times to come to terms with the light, and when they did I was staring at a blank ceiling. The white, dull ceiling was soothing for my eyes, and I felt scared to move them away from the ceiling. I felt uneasy to move them away as it felt like it would cause me pain to do so. I continued to stare at the ceiling hoping the pain would disappear.

"Bella?" a voice said. It sounded heavenly, after all the things that figure had said, his voice sounded like a song compared her. "Bella?" The voice continued. "Bella, please look at me!" he pleaded. He sounded so worried. "Edward" I spoke hoarsely, my voice sounding like sandpaper. I continued to stare at the ceiling, terrified of the pain it would cause to look at him. I cleared my throat and at the same time let my eyes wander to him. I saw that I was in Carlisle's study, on a long chair which was propped up.

"Oh thank god Bella, I thought you may have a concussion! I thought you might even lose some memory! Bella, I am so sorry, I should have been there to catch you! I was in the kitchen when I heard a huge noise, continued by more of these noises. I ran to you but you had already become unconscious, so I rushed you to Carlisle." Edward spoke too quickly, and ignoring the pain I saw the guilt in his eyes.

"Edward, trust me it was not your fault at all. It was me and my two left feet. Stop blaming yourself." I murmured, and closed my eyes at the same time. I was truly exhausted, and also trying to make the pain vanish. "By the way, what is wrong with me?" I asked.

I felt cold hands delicately take my hand in theirs, and I gripped the hand. "You've basically bruised almost every part of your body, and you have a huge lump the size of my fist on the back of your head." He said painfully. I gradually opened my eyes and smiled, "I've had worse." I stated simply, before closing my eyes again. I heard Edward's dark chuckle, and felt his cold lips press onto my forehead. "Sleep my love." He said soothingly, and I felt my body become heavier and heavier.

In sleep, the figure didnt appear which I was very happy about. The last thing I needed was to be reminded


End file.
